Thursday, December 18, 2008

POCUS--AN ICON

It seems I am faced with the destruction of the very things that I adore at every turn. When I moved to Tennessee one of the first dogs I was introduced to was a hound named Pocus. That's his picture above as a baby staying warm. I borrowed the photo from Pocus's human. Even as a baby his eyes were always wide and the whites showed prominent. I would joke to his human that Pocus had eyes that stared through ya. Those eyes are the same today. I never met another dog with those piercing eyes. Pocus and Pie, who passed on last month, are icons to me. They represent what dogs should be. They reflect passion to please and loyalty above and beyond all else. They, Pie and Pocus both, are Innocent beyond the words meaning and dedicated up until death. They are precious. They deserve a few words. As I walk into the room I notice Pocus there on his bed sleeping. But no; his eyes are open. His head raises only just a little. It's plain that he feels pain. I run my hand under his chin as I kneel and sit beside him. His eyes are locked onto my face the whole time. But he knows who I am. The slightest shake of the tail, almost imperceptible, a feeble attempt at a wag. The ever present bulge behind his shoulder is apparent. That bulge that is hastening his demise. I rub behind his ears and he makes a soft smacking sound with his mouth. His eyes never leave mine. I can not stare into his face. I feel so terrible about his future and I don't want him to sense my weakness. I just want to spend a little time with my friend before I leave. "Are you hungry boy?" I stood up and walked to the kitchen where his food bowel is. Pocus laboriously arose to his feet and on wobbly legs, slowly followed me to the food bowel. He stared at me for a lengthily period of time and slowly lowered his head to the food and gently licked at it. He did not pick it up. I watched as his rear legs started to falter and gradually bend. He tried so hard to maintain his stance but the legs just wouldn't hold him up. His feet slid out to the side and he pulled them under him in a sitting position. The eating chore was too much for him. Better to go lie down on his bed. I followed him in the room and watched as this noble animal struggled to make himself comfortable. I sat down on the floor beside him and scooted up close and layed his muzzle on my leg. My left hand caressed him behind his ears and at the back of his head. And those eyes still never left my face. Those expressionless eyes! Unique to only Pocus. Well, I've got to go soon Pocus. I just wanted to stop by and see you today. I wanted to let you know I was thinking of you. No. No. That's not the reason I stopped. That's not the reason at all old friend. I really wanted to see you one last time. Because I know there won't be a tomorrow for us. You have to understand, old one, that you are loved beyond comprehension and that those humans who hold you in the highest esteem will not tolerate you to suffer the way you are. So I am here with you to let you know that I love you and will miss you. No one wishes to harm you dear old friend. I hope you understand. Tomorrow another friend will come to help you start on your own personal journey. Just relax and close your eyes and think of all the good things in your life. I don't want you to be afraid because I asked Pie Pie to walk slowly so you could catch up to her. You both can meet Mother Nature together. She is a wonderful woman. She is your true mother, Pocus. And Pie's. When I go home; I'm going to give each of my kids a hug for you. I'll tell them you are strong and are going away for a long time. And Pocus; when my kids take their final long journey; would you and Pie see that they don't get lost? So, in the morning, my friend; just close your eyes and remember the days of youth and how grand it felt to make your human happy. Your loyalty will never be forgotten. You have been and are still an icon in my life. Well, I have to go now friend. Hope you don't mind if I give you a quick kiss on the muzzle. Good by Pocus. Good by precious dog. Until we meet again.......................